How I stop impulse buying

My arms used to be this full coming home from a day at the mall.

There have been many times in my life when I have used retail therapy to help me feel better.  By definition for me this involves impulse purchases – buying something shiny to make me feel a little brighter.  And here is what I have learned – impulse buying results in lots of stuff that I don’t need and often don’t even really want taking up room in my house.  And the money I spent, I would much rather have saved it for something I really wanted or needed.  

I knew things were bad the day a package arrived in the mail that I didn’t remember ordering.  When I opened it up I vaguely remembered what had happened. I had been stressed about work and not sleeping well several nights earlier.  In the middle of the night, I groggily got on my phone, found a great deal on underwear (which I didn’t need – I already had a drawer full) and ordered several pairs. Including one which said “let it snow” on the waistband – which was particularly strange since I am not the biggest fan of snow!

Now, if I am going to spend money, I try to practice mindful shopping.  The following tips are how I bring awareness to my purchases, instead of absent mindedly making impulse buys.

Redirect the energy

I used impulse shopping to brighten my mood or as a reward for getting through a difficult day.  Now I redirect that energy.  

I feel so much better after a quick meditation break, and I no longer feel the need for retail therapy!

If I feel like I need my mood brightened, I sit down with a guided meditation and breathe for 5-10 minutes.  Usually when I finish I have no interest in shopping anymore. Even if I am not all sunshine and rainbows after my meditation, I have a calmer approach to life and I am not looking for that instant (and short-lived) gratification of a purchase.  (If you are looking for a place to start, check out my guided meditations and breathwork practices here.)

When I am seeking a reward, I have developed a list of non-material “gifts”.  I might sit down with a guilty pleasure tv show and my knitting for an hour.  Or put on my pj’s and climb into bed a few hours early to relax with a book that makes me laugh out loud (currently the Ridiculous Race has me chucking every few pages).  I might go to a restorative yoga class or call a friend I haven’t talked to in a while for an extra long  catch up. Whatever feels a little extravagant to you would work!

Make it hard to shop online

I did most of my impulse shopping online, using my phone, frequently while I was in bed.  There are a few techniques I have developed to make it harder for me to buy things online – now I really need to think before I purchase.

Surprise packages for me (from me) show up a lot less now than they used to.

First, I had Google forget all of my passwords.  Then I started using a password protector. I let the password protector assign all of my passwords randomly, not only does this make them more secure, it also guarantees I won’t be  able to memorize any of them.  Now if I want to log into a website to purchase something, I need to first log into my password protector. That second step is usually just enough extra work that I decide it isn’t worth it.

Second, even if I log into the website (or check out as a guest), I make it harder to do that.  I also changed my PayPal password to something random I can’t remember on my own. And I keep my credit card far away from the bedroom, so there is another extra layer between me and my purchase.

Finally, I banished my phone from the bedroom.  If I wake up in the middle of the night, I am much more likely to pick up a book or magazine and read myself back to sleep than grab my phone to go shopping.  This is all part of my sleep hygiene (you can read more here) and it has improved my life in a number of ways – this is just one.

When shopping in real life

It doesn’t go in the cart unless I really need it.

When I go out shopping in brick and mortar stores, I use a technique I learned from a friend years ago.  If an impulse buy catches my eye, I leave it right where I saw it. If by the time I have finished my shopping in that store I still want that item, I can go back and get it.  Ninety-nine percent of the time, I don’t remember I even wanted something else. This is particularly useful in a store like Target where you can easily go in for a tube of toothpaste and leave with a giant cart full of stuff.

The other trick I use when shopping in real life (and online as well, but less often), is calculating the cost of an item in terms of an hourly salary.  My dad taught me this trick when I got my first job, and it has stuck ever since. Say you see a dress for $100. If you make $20/hour, is that dress worth five hours of work to you?  Again, usually for those impulse buys, the answer is no.

Make a list and stick to it

Now before I leave the house to run any errands at all, I make a list, on paper of what I need.  This applies to the grocery store, hardware store, thrift shopping with friends, Target runs, any errands at all!  

My lists usually end up on the back of an envelope or a post-it note, but a cute notebook makes them a little more enjoyable!

Not only does a list on paper make my errands faster, I don’t wander the store trying to remember what it was I went there for in the first place, it also makes it really clear when I am adding impulse buys to my cart.  

If it isn’t on the list, I probably don’t really need it.  This includes snack food at the grocery store, that adorable section of dollar deals at the entrance to Target, the super cute yoga pants at the thrift store that look like new and are such a good deal, and so many more deals and bargains that I really don’t need.

When I add something to my cart or basket that is not on my list, I am forced to take an extra moment to think through the purchase.  I am in the habit of crossing off every item on my list as I add them to the cart.  When I add an impulse buy, I automatically check my list, it isn’t there, there is nothing to cross off. This gives me a moment to think – do I still want this item which I didn’t want or need when I left the house?  Again, I usually end up leaving these things right in the store where I found them.

Do I feel deprived?

Nope, not at all.  In fact, right now I can not think of a single thing I didn’t buy that I wish I had.  Actually, I look around the house and think about how much STUFF there is and how I would rather have a lot less of it.  

I move about once every two to three years.  And before I move, I do a good house cleaning, purging out as much as possible so it doesn’t need to be packed up and moved to a new home.  Most of the stuff that gets purged – turns out is impulse buys. Things I didn’t want or need in the first place. The only thing I feel deprived of is the time, money and energy I lost bringing these things into my house only to try and resell them or cart them off to a thrift store a few years later.

Hoping these tips help you become a more mindful shopper!